Today we shall continue where we stopped last week on the various antioxidant solutions to impotency. All the distress, and each of those problems, can easily be avoided. However, by accomplishing these simple processes, understanding and believing –absolutely believing – that early impotency or Erectile Dysfunction is not the end of the world and that it is not permanent, and that you are not ‘broken’ for the rest of your life, and it can be cured without even much stress; is paramount to getting out of the problem. Just keep reading the series of this article, take what is said to heart, and then follow the instructions and guidelines. It will also help to learn about and to understand various problems which are due to manmade imposed impotency or Erectile Dysfunction, and know how to find a solution to them.
The first man imposed illness that every sufferer of early impotency or erectile dysfunction people experience and which should be avoided is depression. Studies have shown ED and depressive symptoms can be positively correlated, and have demonstrated that there is indeed a bidirectional relationship between the two conditions. A five- year study revealed that more men with depression are affected by ED than those who do not suffer from depression. Moreover, men with ED have also shown a higher incidence of depression. Furthermore, studies have also shown that the incidence of ED in those who have depression is 1.82 times more than those who do not, and this association is not influenced by age or by factors associated with lifestyle choices and circumstances, or medication use.
ED is generally not a primary cause of depression, but rather, a contributing factor to it as it does not cause depression directly. Most men, if not all, see their sexual ability as a measure of their masculinity and place a high priority on it. As a result, those who suffer from ED are likely to feel frustrated, and embarrassed at their diminished sexual ability. This can exert stress on their daily lives. The fact that they are unable to achieve a proper erection the same way as healthy men, can have a huge impact on their self-esteem. Most of them will think that their problem with ED is their own fault and will blame themselves for it, even though that is not the case. ED causes depression, and depression causes ED. Try to do all you can to avoid this.
Stress and anxiety are also man-imposed leading causes of early impotency or ED. When a sufferer deliberately takes care of anxiety and stress, his sex life will return to normal soon enough and it might even improve as a result of the deliberate avoidance of anxiety and stress. Another man- imposed trigger is the sexual performance anxiety leading to embarrassment and low self-esteem. It must be noted here that failure is as much a part of our lives as success, and most men have faced at least some failures life, in one form or another. However, failing to achieve or to obtain an erection is a failure quite unlike any other. It is the first, and probably the only hurdle in life which can make a man feel like less of a man.
ED threatens man’s ego. It challenges his machismo. The mere attempt to get good erection in the presence of a woman but fail and stay flaccid, shatters a man completely. And invariably, when a man’s fragile self-esteem receives the telling blow, it breaks apart into a million pieces. His pride takes a fatal hit, and dies immediately.
But when men see early impotency or ED as a medical problem, just like malaria, flu, fever, measles, or any other ailment one experiences in life, hope arises and anxiety of performance receive cure.
Male sexual arousal is a complex process that involves the brain, hormones, emotions, nerves, muscles, and blood vessels. ED can result from a problem with any of these. Likewise, stress and mental health problems can cause or worsen ED. Sometimes, a combination of physical and psychological issues can cause ED. For instance, a minor physical problem that slows your sexual response may cause anxiety about maintaining an erection. The resulting anxiety can, in turn, lead to or worsen ED.
The brain plays a key role in triggering the series of physical events which cause an erection, starting with feelings of sexual excitement. A number of things can interfere with sexual feelings and cause or worsen ED. These include: depression, anxiety or other mental health conditions.
Another man- imposed early impotency or ED is when the wife fails to understand and help to get solution. This, more than any other, has sent many husbands to the verge of irreversible impotency. When a man has Erectile Dysfunction, however, it may affect and change his relationship, both with himself and his wife. Things can often get ugly, especially when the wife refuses to understand and cooperate. Evident is the fact that an estimated one in five failed marriages is a direct or indirect result of premature ejaculation, weak erection, small shrinking penis and ED. The man may be embarrassed, and might even feel guilty, which makes it difficult for him to talk to his wife about it. ED has an impact not only on the man, but on his wife as well. A common issue among couples dealing with ED starts with the failure of sexual advances. This can have an adverse effect on issues of trust, intimacy, and closeness. The man withdraws emotionally and physically because of embarrassment and the fear of failure. The wife starts to believe that her husband is losing interest in her, thereby impacting wife’s own self-esteem and feelings of attractiveness. The relationship suffers, and romance dies a slow, agonising death.
In reality though, the man is not losing interest, but may be manifesting signs of frustration and humiliation at not being able to effectively participate in love making or sexual acts. Furthermore, many husbands think it is inappropriate to need nurturance, or to admit that they need a hug, or to seek affection from their wives. But one of the many cures of early impotency is even the tender loving care and display of affection form the wife and heavy love play, which most husbands shy away from. This, most times, does not only help husbands to regain the support of their wives, it helps them regain their sense of erotic feeling which mostly help regain erection especially when the wife carries out some base of the penis massaging.
Medically, shortage of blood not reaching the penis is a major reason for erectile dysfunction or early impotency and this is the area solution is mostly needed. Lots of amino acids, enzymes and proteins are needed to be added to your diet, so restoring effective flow of blood to the penis helps to provide all the antioxidant that will help permanently cure the challenge.
Remember, in most cases, ED is caused by something physical, such as alcoholism or other forms of substance abuse, certain medications, clogged blood vessels (atherosclerosis) diabetes, heart diseases, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, low testosterone, metabolic syndrome (this is a condition involving increase blood pressure) high insulin levels, body fat around the waist line, multiple sclerosis, general obesity, Parkinson’s diseases, peyronie’s diseases (which is the development of scar inside the penis), surgeries or injuries that affect the pelvic area or the spinal cord, tobacco use and the treatment for prostate cancer or enlarged prostrate.
The antioxidant solutions to all these are available in food and supplements such as; the combination of the white of raw egg with small portion of watermelon blended together. Drink daily especially at night.
To be continued next week.
QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
The effect of my weight on my marriage
I lost my marriage of eight years because my husband could not stand my being overweight. Four years into the marriage, he stopped making love to me. I want to move ahead and forget about him but most of the exercises I have tried out are not helping. This was not my weight before now. Any hope for me?
Mrs. Matins Ike
Get a scale weight weighing machine in your bathroom and weigh your weight each week. Research shows that people, who succeed at losing weight, check their weights often. Not eating one type of food doesn’t translate into cutting overall calories. Your body needs some dietary fat such as olive oil, fish oil, avocado, and small amounts of nuts to function. Drinking water, especially before mealtime, helps fill you up and makes you eat less. Adults who drank two cups of water before each meal lost more weight than those who didn’t.
Don’t skip meals if you’re trying to lose weight. You’ll feel hungrier later and would be tempted to raid the fridge or nibble on junk. Instead, you can place yourself on a long period of fast with small portion of meals. There are lots of natural juice that help reduce body mass.
Despite the popularity of carbohydrate-free diets, your body needs this important fuel to work. Eat slowly because there’s a lag between when your mouth says “mmm” and your brain registers fullness in your stomach. If you rest between bites and pace yourself, you’ll give your brain more time to tell your stomach that you’re full.
Vegetables are comparatively low in calories, filled with fibre and nutrition, and help you feel full. A new study shows that limiting food choices doesn’t help people lose weight. Rather, get a diet that includes your own food choices, then eat high-calorie less often and in small amounts, or in lower-calorie versions.
I feel used by my wife
My wife’s sexual desire seems to be tied to my income. When I make more money, sex is good and frequent. When my income is down, there is no sex or desire. I fear this problem is leading us towards divorce, because I feel being used by my wife.
Mr. Balogun junior
There are many aspects of a marriage relationship that impact a couple’s sexual intimacy, and money is a common one. This may relate to the symbolic meaning of money, to fears associated with financial insecurity, to a ‘barter’ attitude about sex and money, or to relational patterns that are subtly tied to work. Identifying how your wife’s sexual behaviour relates to your income is crucial to effecting change. It’s equally important to recognise that sexual intimacy is dynamic between two people and rarely the problem of just one partner. So, while you work together on understanding her behaviour, work on what you may be contributing to the problem (besides a variable income).
Money as a symbol is a place to start. Ask yourselves what money means to each of you. In our culture, it is most often associated with power and a sense of competence or prestige. When your sense of personal worth is linked to wealth, your relational world can be impacted by changes in your finances. Being able to have the manifestations of wealth becomes the basis of your self-acceptance. If these evidences of value or importance wane, it becomes a threat to your wellbeing. That, in turn, can affect your feelings of sexual attractiveness or playfulness. Similarly if money means “power,” a mate who is financially successful may be more attractive. The presence or absence of wealth is often connected with inner feelings of safety and security. Depending on a person’s childhood economic experience, one may become quite anxious if assets are threatened.
It is not uncommon for sex to be conditioned to other life-performance issues. Some couples drift into patterns of using sexual favours as a reward for or motivation towards some desired behaviour. This is a potentially dangerous basis for intimacy since there is usually some feeling of resentment attached.
I sleep off before the foreplay is over
For years, my wife has told me that conversation is an important part of foreplay for her. I try to stay focused during that time before sex, but I get sleepy and lose interest. As a result, my wife gets the conversation she needs, and I don’t get the intercourse I need. I’d feel selfish if I didn’t provide the kind of foreplay she needs, but how can I stay awake long enough to close the deal?
Mr Peter Leo
Conversation is an important aspect of foreplay for most women. So the most obvious solution to your dilemma is to find a better time of day to play around. That will allow you to enjoy an unhurried interval for conversation, relaxing foreplay and intercourse that will be satisfying to both of you. This could be earlier in the evening or even before work in the morning. If you live close to the office, you could even schedule a mid-day rendezvous.
If you can express your frustration and ask for your wife’s help, together you may find other creative solutions. Sometimes, it’s hard for men to share their needs openly, seeing such an admission as a sign of weakness or failure. But wives usually want to be just as sensitive to their husbands’ sexual rhythm and responses as their husbands are to theirs. Your wife is probably thankful for your concern about her needs and will welcome the opportunity to reciprocate.
Another solution can be for you to be satisfied by an occasional “quickie”—sex without the lengthy preliminaries. I have found that even a quickie can be mutually enjoyable.
Being sexually satisfied greatly influences your husband’s ability to perform at work.
By Funmi Akingbade
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